An Amish farmer walking through his field, notices a man drinking from his pond.

The Amishman shouts: "Trink das wasser nicht. Die kuhen haben dahin gesheissen."
Which means: "Don't drink the water, the cows have sh*t in it.

The man shouts back: "I'm a Muslim, I don't understand. Please speak in English."

The Amishman says: "Use two hands, you'll get more."

HMA